And Yet

This word was given to me over two days, November 19 and 20, 2021.

Are these things too hard for me? Are they beyond my grasp? Is my power to save cut short? Nay, except by your faith, except by your opinion. Your opinion cuts short your faith, and your lack of faith prevents my deliverance. And yet … and yet my Spirit moves where He will, as He will in the heart of men. (Rm 9:18) Does he heal a man who lacks faith? Yes. Betimes. Does He deliver a one for simply calling, though he is without faith? Yes. He will. Does He do for “her” just because He can when she doth not know Him at all? Yes. He does.

“How then should we have faith?” you ask. “What is the purpose of it if He will move outside of it?”

How much greater is His move when faith is present? I ask in return. How much more can He perform upon a willing, humble heart? Rebellion is as witchcraft. Rebellion yields its power to things outside of me, and yet … and yet I needed Paul, then Saul, to carry my gospel. Was he not in rebellion? Yes. Did he not destroy my saints? Yes. And willingly. Just as your lack of faith prevents my move. And yet … and yet I see the thoughts and intents of the heart. (Heb 4:12) What if Paul refused to believe? What if after his Damascus-road experience, he turned aside from me? And yet I knew his heart in advance.

“…for the Spirit searcheth all things, yea, the deep things of God.” (1Co 2:10)

You have gotten off-center from my Word, off-center but not off the map of my plans for you, nor entirely out of my hand. You lost your footing, stepped from solid ground into something more sinking, yet did not leave my grasp. I see your doubts; I see also your faith. I know the details of thine heart and wipe away thy tears of confusion to give thee days of happiness. Of joy. Of unity. It all seems scattered by the wind, blown about in many directions. Thy soul is weary, yet I am able to support, able to sustain.

“How do I know thy voice is speaking? How do I continue on with ‘them?’ Why give me these desires only to lack their fulfillment?” You have asked these things. And yet … and yet I see thy heart behind thy doubts. I have searched thee and found Presence; I found a mustard-seed to plant and gently water in. To water and cause to grow, to sprout and rise, you know not how (Mk 4:27), to extend branches and become a greater thing than you have imagined … and sooner than you’ve planned.

“I’ve grown tired of waiting,” you said to me, and I understand this. But there is growth in the waiting and strength in developing our closeness. No seed sprouts overnight, else it fades quickly in the heat, but given roots dug deeply, no weather can prevent it from its fullness. (Ps 1:3)

“It always feels like tomorrow,” you counter. “I am tired of yet another ‘it’s turning soon’ prophecy.”

Feed not on prophecy. Feed on my Word. Soak in my Presence through worship. Seek my Face and not a fleshly experience. There is no satisfaction in pleasing the flesh, but only temporary emotions, lit as a fire without a hearth for the flame. Seek not an experience. Seek not a moment’s passing flame but a continuous filling, a river within thee, the eternal spring, not a bucket you drew for yourself from another man’s lake.

“For as the rain cometh down, and the snow from heaven, and returneth not thither, but watereth the earth, and maketh it bring forth and bud, that it may give seed to the sower, and bread to the eater: So shall my word be that goeth forth out of my mouth: it shall not return unto me void, but it shall accomplish that which I please, and it shall prosper in the thing whereto I sent it.” (Is 55:10-11)

I am the rain in the summer, in winter, I am the snow, and neither is under any man’s control. Neither in their falling, nor in where they land, nor in what they cause to spring up on earth’s blessed sands. I am the wind which bloweth wherever it will, uncontainable, unfastened, and yet … and yet not without pattern. Not without results. (Jn 3:8)

As no man can contain the wind, as no man can bottle up the rains, I cannot be contained in your lack of faith. And yet … and yet even that is not a limitation. When doth the rain wait for the earth to be either wet or dry? When doth the wind wait for the trees to be in flower or in the depths of fall? The seasons are mine, the timing of them set at my hand, and what I shall do in thee is as certain as my Spirit’s move in men. I ask for faith, but I move in the midst of doubt. Never is there a man who I ignore even when fallen into deep rebellion. Are there consequences? Yes. Am I unable to redeem? No. You, oh man of the earth, have made me too short to save. You have condemned where I would bless. You have blessed what I have condemned.

And yet … and yet I will move anyway.

Mercy. Mercy. My heart crieth mercy. And not judgment. Man would give judgment. I would bring mercy. There is no one I have not already searched and found wanting, but where sin abounds, grace does much more abound. (Rm 5:20) Did I not say I would give life more abundantly? (Jn 10:10) Yea, life abundantly with grace abundantly and mercy in abundance. There is judgment for sin, yes, but grace for repentance and mercy for redemption.

You wait for the redemption of a nation, and it shall come, but I wait for courage born of mercy. I shed my blood to bring mercy. I shed my blood to bring grace. And yet … and yet this type of sacrifice you do not understand. This type of love you cannot fathom. Men have relegated love to a thing of the flesh. But love of the flesh is but the basest form of love and easily perverted. For I SO LOVED. Love so great, I wept with it, so high I could not but fulfill it. For the travail of my soul, I sought satisfaction. (Is 53:11) I counted not the price but considered only the rescue. It was a great cost, a great cost and yet … and yet a greater cost to lose the man I had created, made in my image after my likeness, made to speak, to govern, to be like me.

“He shall see of the travail of his soul, and shall be satisfied: by his knowledge shall my righteous servant justify many; for he shall bear their iniquities. Therefore will I divide him a portion with the great, and he shall divide the spoil with the strong; because he hath poured out his soul unto death: and he was numbered with the transgressors; and he bare the sin of many, and made intercession for the transgressors.” (Is 53:11-12)

Can you not see it? Your picture is unfinished. You paint with half a brush, your colors blended. You see in a glass darkly. (1Co 13:12) Look you at that man, at thy neighbor, in the LIGHT of my countenance. See him as who I died to save and be willing to give of your all for his rescue as I gave my all for yours. Before time, I saw these in this state and could not bear it. I COULD NOT BEAR IT THEN, AND I CANNOT BEAR IT NOW. My way is rescue, my method is mercy, and this same I require from those in MY CHURCH. Look not to your own things, to your own denomination, to you own families, but to those things of your neighbor and do as your FATHER IN HEAVEN CHOSE TO DO, who saw your condition and decided to save thee. Decided to give mercy.

Ask me to save a nation but to punish the people and these two things are antithesis of each other. A nation is the people, and the people are the Lord’s because I have said so. DO NOT THINK ME SHORT, FAULTED, AND INEPT. NOR DEAF, NOR INSENSITIVE, NOR HARSH AND JUDGMENTAL, WHEN I CAME TO EARTH AS YESHUA TO SAVE MANKIND, I did not exempt one race or one culture from MY WORK on the CROSS. I died for all to give mercy for all and desired a people, willing to do the same.

Here is my heart, bared before thee. Here is my hand, extended to save. Here is thy sustenance to the work placed before thee, and here in my Presence, the strength that you crave. The battle has extended, and the fight fraught with cares, and yet … and yet I am enough in thee, my mercy eternal, everlasting to save.

Suzanne D. Williams, Author